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Apr. 20th, 2024 09:52
Someone I'm made for
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overmoreThere was only so much Luca could do before he started doubting himself.
The more time passed, the more his worries grew, and even he knew that was undeniably going to affect him and his relationship with work.
A well-known scientist, something almost unheard of for omegas, doubting himself because his pregnancy was progressing. Not something he should be surprised by, especially with how others were around him. Not a day would pass that someone would try and speak behind his back on how “there should be a free spot in his department soon since he probably won't be coming back once he has the child”. Many nasty, backhanded compliments too. One guy told him Alva was “finally going to have a normal life since he'll have someone always take care of the house as he'd now just leave work when the baby was there”.
The assumption that Luca would just give up everything he'd built for himself, all on his own, was unbelievable to him. No one supported his decision to go into science, not even his family. The amount of times his father just tried to sneakily make him sign some marriage-related papers so that he couldn't go to university was more than could count now.
Alva was the only person in his life who couldn't care less of those social norms. It's why Luca loved him, it's why he married him. The choice of having a child was their own, and it was not something that just came up once and they said “Sure, why not?”. The amount of consideration that went into that was more than the consideration on what Luca's thesis paper should be on, and that was saying something.
But somehow, everyone assumed that Luca was now “fixed”. He hated that term, but so many people were using it behind his back to a degree that he couldn't handle it anymore.
He had started to question the decision to even have the child now.
No one saw it as something nice or happy for them. It was only something that would “put him in his place” and free a spot in the department once he's on leave and until he recovers.
Was it truly a good idea? In a world where he was considered someone lower just because of his secondary gender, was it worth it to even do this?
He’d probably need to talk to Alva about this. The situation is going in a direction he was not fond of, and doing this on his own was not something he should consider. The child would be theirs in the end.
That day he got home earlier. His mind was telling him to make something to eat for both of them. The more time passed, the more his instincts started to kick in. At least one or two more months before he won’t be able to go to work at all, and he’d be stuck here, having to do stuff around the house. The idea didn’t please him much, he wanted to continue his and Alva’s research, but he couldn’t do anything about that now. He also had to take a break too, especially with how tired he’d been getting lately.
Maybe he should make that meal.
---
When Alva came back home to a prepared dinner, he was surprised.
“Since when do you do this on your own?”
“I just felt like it”, Luca simply said.
It wasn’t anything special, he could cook for himself, he had to in the end. To Alva, it might not be a usual sight since they’re used to doing most things together. Cooking, chores, shopping, all was split according to how much each of them could do at the given moment.
Their dinner was silent. Luca did feel less enthusiastic about everything now, and he thought it was showing somehow. He liked to talk about things he did, what he was planning to do, it was something Alva liked about him. He was never quiet about things he enjoyed, so to see him like this must've been questionable at least.
“I see you're quiet today.”
Luca could just nod. He wasn't sure how to bring anything up.
“Care to share? You know I will listen.”
“It's about the baby”, he quietly started.
“Do you feel well? Do we need to go to the doctor?”
“No, not that, the baby's fine. It's… the people, rather. As you know, I'll have to leave in a few months and until the baby's already a bit older. I'm not… sure what to think of that leaving still.”
Alva tilted his head. “Are you worried about work?”
“Yes. You know how they are. They always talk about how it's going to be so good that I'm gonna leave, so that there's an empty spot they can get. I'm pretty sure they won't even let me come back even once I'm healthy again, because why would an omega be there when he has a child to take care of?”
His words might've sounded harsh and were worded clumsily, but he was having enough of everything. Stress was piling up.
“I don't want to sacrifice my work, our work, for a child, no matter how much I do want one. In this line of work, it's impossible to relax or lay low at any point with how everyone in the university is competitive. It would be-”
“Luca.”
Alva would rarely interrupt him, and this was one of the situations where it probably required that.
“You know I am the head of the department, right?”
Luca nodded.
“And you know that no matter what, no one would be taking up your spot, no matter how much people would pressure me for that. I do not desire to work with people who are not on par with me. You, Luca, are one of the few who are able to do that well. You are irreplaceable to me.”
He knew those were not just empty words of encouragement, Alva meant what he said. He still remembers the first days they worked together when he just finished his last year of studying. A harsh tempo, so many things to do and so many tasks that had to be completed in time, Alva knew for no mercy when working sometimes. Only a few could keep up, and Luca was one of them, the best in fact. It was how he and Alva even ended up together in the first place.
“If they really want to put someone instead of you there, they won’t have me on that team. I would not want to work with anyone unable to keep up.”
Too much trust in Luca, that’s what he had. Not that it was a bad thing, especially with how things were.
“So don’t think for a second that you’d be replaced just like that. That won’t be happening at all, not under my watch.”
Luca let out a sigh of relief, something he didn’t do often.
“Thanks. I don’t know why I started thinking like that, I know you’d never let it happen.”
“The way our society is built makes it hard for omegas to function on their own, to have whatever job they want or to just be a part of society without looking down on them. I have never cared for our differences like others have, you know that well. Whatever you think might happen are valid concerns, I cannot blame you for having them. I just want you to remember that I won’t let them do any of that, not while I’m still working in the university.”
A smile creeps up on Luca’s face. Alva knew what he was saying, there was no denying that. That man would do anything for him, anything just to make sure he was alright.
There’s nothing in this world Luca would trade that for.
The more time passed, the more his worries grew, and even he knew that was undeniably going to affect him and his relationship with work.
A well-known scientist, something almost unheard of for omegas, doubting himself because his pregnancy was progressing. Not something he should be surprised by, especially with how others were around him. Not a day would pass that someone would try and speak behind his back on how “there should be a free spot in his department soon since he probably won't be coming back once he has the child”. Many nasty, backhanded compliments too. One guy told him Alva was “finally going to have a normal life since he'll have someone always take care of the house as he'd now just leave work when the baby was there”.
The assumption that Luca would just give up everything he'd built for himself, all on his own, was unbelievable to him. No one supported his decision to go into science, not even his family. The amount of times his father just tried to sneakily make him sign some marriage-related papers so that he couldn't go to university was more than could count now.
Alva was the only person in his life who couldn't care less of those social norms. It's why Luca loved him, it's why he married him. The choice of having a child was their own, and it was not something that just came up once and they said “Sure, why not?”. The amount of consideration that went into that was more than the consideration on what Luca's thesis paper should be on, and that was saying something.
But somehow, everyone assumed that Luca was now “fixed”. He hated that term, but so many people were using it behind his back to a degree that he couldn't handle it anymore.
He had started to question the decision to even have the child now.
No one saw it as something nice or happy for them. It was only something that would “put him in his place” and free a spot in the department once he's on leave and until he recovers.
Was it truly a good idea? In a world where he was considered someone lower just because of his secondary gender, was it worth it to even do this?
He’d probably need to talk to Alva about this. The situation is going in a direction he was not fond of, and doing this on his own was not something he should consider. The child would be theirs in the end.
That day he got home earlier. His mind was telling him to make something to eat for both of them. The more time passed, the more his instincts started to kick in. At least one or two more months before he won’t be able to go to work at all, and he’d be stuck here, having to do stuff around the house. The idea didn’t please him much, he wanted to continue his and Alva’s research, but he couldn’t do anything about that now. He also had to take a break too, especially with how tired he’d been getting lately.
Maybe he should make that meal.
---
When Alva came back home to a prepared dinner, he was surprised.
“Since when do you do this on your own?”
“I just felt like it”, Luca simply said.
It wasn’t anything special, he could cook for himself, he had to in the end. To Alva, it might not be a usual sight since they’re used to doing most things together. Cooking, chores, shopping, all was split according to how much each of them could do at the given moment.
Their dinner was silent. Luca did feel less enthusiastic about everything now, and he thought it was showing somehow. He liked to talk about things he did, what he was planning to do, it was something Alva liked about him. He was never quiet about things he enjoyed, so to see him like this must've been questionable at least.
“I see you're quiet today.”
Luca could just nod. He wasn't sure how to bring anything up.
“Care to share? You know I will listen.”
“It's about the baby”, he quietly started.
“Do you feel well? Do we need to go to the doctor?”
“No, not that, the baby's fine. It's… the people, rather. As you know, I'll have to leave in a few months and until the baby's already a bit older. I'm not… sure what to think of that leaving still.”
Alva tilted his head. “Are you worried about work?”
“Yes. You know how they are. They always talk about how it's going to be so good that I'm gonna leave, so that there's an empty spot they can get. I'm pretty sure they won't even let me come back even once I'm healthy again, because why would an omega be there when he has a child to take care of?”
His words might've sounded harsh and were worded clumsily, but he was having enough of everything. Stress was piling up.
“I don't want to sacrifice my work, our work, for a child, no matter how much I do want one. In this line of work, it's impossible to relax or lay low at any point with how everyone in the university is competitive. It would be-”
“Luca.”
Alva would rarely interrupt him, and this was one of the situations where it probably required that.
“You know I am the head of the department, right?”
Luca nodded.
“And you know that no matter what, no one would be taking up your spot, no matter how much people would pressure me for that. I do not desire to work with people who are not on par with me. You, Luca, are one of the few who are able to do that well. You are irreplaceable to me.”
He knew those were not just empty words of encouragement, Alva meant what he said. He still remembers the first days they worked together when he just finished his last year of studying. A harsh tempo, so many things to do and so many tasks that had to be completed in time, Alva knew for no mercy when working sometimes. Only a few could keep up, and Luca was one of them, the best in fact. It was how he and Alva even ended up together in the first place.
“If they really want to put someone instead of you there, they won’t have me on that team. I would not want to work with anyone unable to keep up.”
Too much trust in Luca, that’s what he had. Not that it was a bad thing, especially with how things were.
“So don’t think for a second that you’d be replaced just like that. That won’t be happening at all, not under my watch.”
Luca let out a sigh of relief, something he didn’t do often.
“Thanks. I don’t know why I started thinking like that, I know you’d never let it happen.”
“The way our society is built makes it hard for omegas to function on their own, to have whatever job they want or to just be a part of society without looking down on them. I have never cared for our differences like others have, you know that well. Whatever you think might happen are valid concerns, I cannot blame you for having them. I just want you to remember that I won’t let them do any of that, not while I’m still working in the university.”
A smile creeps up on Luca’s face. Alva knew what he was saying, there was no denying that. That man would do anything for him, anything just to make sure he was alright.
There’s nothing in this world Luca would trade that for.
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